It’s official. School is now out.
Or something like that.
Which is why I’ve been so quiet this week: all the end of the year activities and such.
I did, however find time to make this cute little apron:
There is a tutorial somewhere on this blog, but I couldn’t find it.
So, I’ll tell you myself but only if you promise to save your oohs and ahhs for her.
Twenty Minute Apron Tutorial
This project should take 20 minutes and cost $4 to make.
First, drive to Wal-mart.
While you are there try to find someone
helpful alive to tell you where they keep bandannas.
When you fail to find anyone that meets the above criteria, just wander aimlessly through the store hoping to find them on your own.
While wandering through the store go ahead and fill up your cart with things that you just remembered that you need. Like toilet paper. And a humming bird feeder. And humming bird nectar. And bubbles, a green machine carpet cleaner, a trivet, seed packets, Old Maid and Go Fish, an Uno Bar, a new beach towel, two more beach towels, one more beach towel in case we have company and need an extra beach towel, and allergy medicine.
Finally, find and select one bandanna for your apron.
Next make your way to the fabric department and buy 1 yard of rick-rack and 1 1/2 – 2 yards of wide, unwired ribbon. (And also several yards of fabric from their bargain table for other projects you might do someday. And pom-poms, in case you need them.)
Walk to the cutting table and notice that there is no helpful blue-vest to be seen.
Ding the bell.
Ding the bell again.
Ding the bell again.
Ding the bell one last time. Try to make it sound impatient.
Feel bad when the blue vest finally appears and inside it is a really sweet little
old lady senior citizen and the only nice employee in the entire store.
Smile sweetly. Chat about your project. And remember to ask about her grandkids.
Feel guilty the entire time.
Wait patiently until she is finished and then wheel your full cart to the bank of registers.
Now it is decision time. Try to find a checker that does not look like he/she is on crack.
Consider, do they work at Wal-Mart to buy crack or do they buy crack because they work at Wal-Mart? Hmmm….
Select a checker and pay.
Cringe when your $4 project costs $150.
Cringe when you realize that the gas you just used probably added another $27 to the cost of your project.
Drag out your sewing machine or find a needle. Realize you forgot to buy matching thread but be grateful when you find some.
Sew by hand or machine the wide ribbon across the top of your bandanna for the ties and the rick-rack across the bottom for decoration.
Cringe when you realize that your 20 minute project took 3 hours.
Smile when you see how cute it is.
Decide to make another, right after you run to Wal-Mart for supplies.
And that’s what works for me.